Red Chicken
by the fictional therapist
Summary: When the team after case pizza leads to a drawn out game of chicken between Jane and Lisbon, what happens when neither of them are willing to back down?
1. Chapter 1

Mentalist fanfic

**Author note- So, one of the reviews on Snapped asked for a multi chapter fic, so I came up with this. **

**Disclaimer- the only thing of The Mentalist that I own is a DVD.**

He was sat in her chair. Drinking her beer. Eating her pizza. Bad decision.

The whole team was sat in the bullpen, crowded round Cho's desk devouring the traditional case closed pizza, laughing and joking around in the way they only did when the case was closed and the bad guy had been put away. Laughter came easily at this time, a simple remedy to all the sadness, anger and loathing that built up during the case, and as the beer flowed freely and the pizza was eaten they all remembered why they did their job.

It had all been fun and games until Lisbon had gone to the bathroom. Jane, ever the annoying consultant, had decided that the easiest way to annoy her would be to sit in her chair when she came back; forcing her to sit on one of the much less comfortable seats he had pilfered from around the bullpen. Or better yet he could sit on and mess around with her chair, the one that she had spent weeks fiddling with until it was the exact right height. Now, that would annoy her,

Only it didn't.

When Lisbon returned and found him in her chair she decided that two could play at that game, and plonked herself down right in his lap. Which wasn't awkward at all.

The rest of the team stared on in some combination of horror and confusion as their boss, sensible, careful Agent Lisbon, just walked over to her wayward consultant and sat down on his readily available lap. She didn't just sit on his lap, she snuggled down into his lap in a similar way to a cat, wriggling around until his knees spread to accommodate her between them, and his back lolled back into the chair to give her space to sit.

She wriggled slightly in his lap, pressing herself onto his groin and hips in particular, and suddenly Jane was very grateful for the biofeedback techniques he had employed in this situation so many times before, or it would have been the most awkward moment in his life. What could have been worse than his boss snuggling into his lap to teach him a lesson and finding that he was enjoying this particular 'lesson' far too much. Her hair brushed under his nose and he could smell that scent that was entirely her, the fruity smell of her shampoo, the bitter hint of coffee and that slight twang that was entirely her own. It was rare that he smelt it so close, so right in his face, and he could barely stifle a groan at the thought of her being so close.

Jane tensed as she snuggled into him yet more, and Lisbon could barely hide her victorious smirk at the obvious affect her proximity was having on him. It served him right for sitting in her chair, and this was a pretty good way to punish him. There was a way she could take it a step farther though, so she leaned forward and picked up the cold beer she had been enjoying before the bathroom trip, the bottle that Jane had had his mouth around only moments earlier and slowly lifted it to her mouth, making sure to cast a glance back at Jane just as the bottle touched her lips.

She ground back into him, rolling her hips against his stomach. Her little show was obviously exciting him, because she could feel him, or rather Little Jane, pressed against her back. This was way out of hand, but it was too good for her to stop. This feeling of power over him was something she could only dream about.

Obviously her consultant wasn't as unflappable or stony as he appeared. Well most of him wasn't. The part of him that was pressed into her hip was definitely stony, almost scarily so. To test just how 'stony' that part was she experimentally rolled her hips backwards, grinding her pelvis into his. She delighted in the small, barely audible grunt that tickled at her ear, and did it again just to hear him lose control like that. This time though the answering groan was loud and deep, certainly loud enough for the rest of the team to have heard it.

The rest of the team who were now sat around the table, all their faces showing their shock, except the impassable Cho of course. He maintained his usual stoic expression, although an eyebrow was quirked in question at the strange show his uptight, careful boss was giving them.

Grace, Rigsby and Cho all got up to leave at the exact same moment when both Lisbon and Jane muttered curses at her latest action. They muttered half excuses of "it's late" and "I need to sleep." Lisbon didn't even hear them leave, just noticed when she turned back from Jane again that they were all alone in a bullpen that was silent apart from Lisbon's heavy breathing and Jane's intermittent groans.

"Jane," she whispered, not finding the breath to speak any louder.

"Mmm?" he nuzzled into her neck as he said it, causing her to temporarily lose her train of thought and become embroiled in the teasing hip rolls again.

"Jane, we're alone"

"And?" she groaned in frustration. How could a man who so prized his intellect be so dense?

"And we don't have to restrain ourselves anymore."

"That was you being restrained! You were dry humping me in front of all of your colleagues. How exactly was that being restrained, my dear Lisbon!"

"Jane, trust me if i was being unrestrained we would not both be fully clothed, and you would not be capable of saying whole words, let alone condescending speeches. Do you really want me to be unrestrained with you, to be completely and utterly myself with you?"

"Ah, Hell y-" he was cut off abruptly by Lisbon spinning round and sealing her lips to his.

It was a kiss full of promise, passionate, hungry and hard but loving and gentle at the same time. It was a kiss of love, but of lust at the same time. Lisbon's tongue slid into Jane's mouth he immediately reciprocated, their tongues twisting in and out of each other's mouths in a battle for dominance.

His hands fell to her hips, gripping them roughly in his dexterous hands, long fingers tracing up and down her ribs. He teased and caressed in exactly the right spots and Lisbon found herself moaning into the increasingly violent kiss.

Her hands slid down the front of his shirt, impatiently pulling on buttons to expose his chest to her gaze. As more skin was exposed the speed of her unbuttoning increased, until she was basically ripping them off. His hands fisted under the hem of her t shirt, and he separated from her for just a moment to yank it over her head at the exact moment she undid his last button.

They both sighed slightly at the reveal of so much new skin to explore, and both leaned in at the same moment to nip and tease at the exposed skin. Lisbon latched onto the corded muscle beneath his ear and nibbled at it lightly. Jane groaned at the thought of HIS Lisbon being completely unrestrained with him, and again when her hands slid down his surprisingly muscled chest to the snap of his trousers. He found the snap of hers just as easily, and he realised as he tugged on the button that there was no going back from here. She did not seem to realise the implications of what could, hopefully would, happen if she carried on undressing him in an empty bullpen. However much his baser instincts told him to just get on with it and give Lisbon what she so obviously wanted, his gentlemanly manners still lurked in the back of his brain somewhere, and they were telling him that, although Lisbon might want a quick, forgettable fuck against a table in the bullpen, Teresa, his Teresa, deserved more, a lot more.

He pulled back from her kiss, pushing lightly against her chest to keep her from pulling him back in.

"Lisbon, stop." He put as much oomph into his voice as he could, but it was still quiet, marred by the panting from the kissing. She looked up at him with eyes clouded with lust, but also with a hint of confusion. "Lisbon, I can't do this."

She pulled back from him sharply, hurt, angry tears pouring down her face. "What, are you saying you don't want me Jane? Has your great and mighty ego decided that I'm not good enough for you?" More tears rolled down her face with every word, and Jane wanted nothing more than to pull her into his arms and protect her from what was hurting her, even if it was him. But he needed her to hear this, needed her to know that she was more than just a one night stand for him. She had been a hell of a lot more than that for quite some time now.

"No, Lisbon, I do want you, but I want you for more than one drunken, forgettable night against a table, I want our first time to be special, to be something that will stay with us forever. This-" He gestured at their state of undress and at the bullpen around them. "This is not special, or wonderful or amazing, or any of the other hundred things I want our first time to be. You deserve something extraordinary Teresa. You deserve more than this."

Tears flowed down his face too now as they just stared at one other, the weight of his confession filling the air between them. Then Teresa smiled and said simply "OK"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_**This is just something I came up with when I was tired and had a cold. Be warned, it is smutty. If your imagination filled in the gap after the end of the last chapter then you can skip this, there's nothing important or unmissable here, just a continuation of the flirting with an added kick. I would prefer it if you read and reviewed my first attempt at smut. Likes or Dislikes will be fine. Thanks. (If you don't read then be aware that Jane and Lisbon have moved to the attic and had sex, just so you now the scene for the next chapter)**_

There was no way they would have made it to Lisbon's place, so they settled for crashing into Jane's loft, half dressed and attached to each other by a kiss that was only broken every few seconds for more clothing to be removed. The process of clothing removal took longer than either of them would have liked, but there was no way they were going to just leave evidence of their late night encounter lying haphazardly around where anyone could find it the next morning. It was bad enough that the team had already seen enough to guess what had happened after they retreated home, without the added worry of someone important finding out that Patrick Jane and Teresa Lisbon had been doing very bad things to each other.

And doing very bad things to each other they were. Jane was dragging Lisbon along by her hips, keeping her pressed tight against him as they neared his sanctuary, and Lisbon was running her hands up and down his toned chest and stomach, echoing his groans when she hit a particularly sensitive area. All the while their tongues were battling for dominance, slinking in and out of each other's mouths. They only grew more aggressive when Jane's calves hit the corner of his bed, Lisbon anchoring her feet on his floor before shoving against his chest with both hands, pushing his naked form onto the mattress. He hit it with a satisfying thud, and she leapt on him like a predatory beast, landing on his calves and delighting in the shudder that her small movements produced.

By this point Jane was completely caught up in his boss's movements, perhaps too much so. The fact that this would be his first time since Angela died hit him dead in the chest, the breath rushing out of him in a gasp of horror. It had been eight years, and although it was excruciatingly obvious that his equipment was in full working order after eight years it would be like losing his virginity all over again. Although there was no woman he would rather re-lose it with than Lisbon he remembered his first time with disdain, having lasted only a minute or so once he actually got going. Would re-losing his virginity be over as quick as originally losing it? That would be embarrassing, not to mention frustrating. It was his first time with a woman he truly loved, and they both deserved something miraculous and perfect, but as Lisbon continued her teasing ministrations on him it was becoming painfully clear that he wasn't going to last long enough for it to be miraculous, or perfect or even amazing. He needed to tell Lisbon that, so she wouldn't be disappointed or annoyed when their lovemaking was inevitably cut short. He grabbed both her torturous hands and pulled her up to face him.

"Lisbon, if you keep doing that this is going to be over disappointingly soon." The pain he felt was evident in his voice, and for a moment Lisbon felt a pang of guilt for pushing him somewhere he was obviously not ready to go. He cut off those thoughts when he continued to speak. "It's not you, you haven't done anything wrong or made me go too fast, it's just, well it's been eight years, and although that-" he gestured downwards "Is obviously working pretty damn well, I know that I'm not going to last very long once it actually happens. I'm only telling you so that you don't get angry or disappointed."

She leaned up and kissed him, long and deep. She looked him right in the eyes and said "Patrick Jane, you will never be a disappointment to me, especially not now. I'm surprised you even can after all this time and so many traumas. Anything you can give me will be enough. You got that?" He nodded "Good. Anyway, it's been a while for me too, and with how unbelievably worked up you got me with the show near the table I'll be surprised if I last that long myself."

"How worked up I got you! You were the one-"He was cut off by Lisbon's lips pressing insistently to his at the same moment that her hips rose up to sit directly above his. His tongue slid against hers and into her mouth at the same moment she lowered herself down onto him, both of them gasping at the incredible feeling of finally being together like this.

Lisbon lowered herself excruciatingly slowly, savouring every minute of the sweet torture that this session had become. Their kisses became little more than pants of air shared between tow mouths as Lisbon endeavoured to take more of him, to take all of him. Jane was more than willing to give her all of him, and more if she desired. He would give her anything.

What seemed like a lifetime of drawn out pleasure and pain later Lisbon settled against Jane's pelvis, groaning as she realised that she now had him, all of him inside her. He was groaning too, feeling Lisbon's strong muscles all around him and above him. He finally had her, all off her bared before him in all her glory. A single tear slid down his cheek at the sheer perfection of this moment, and as Lisbon wiped it away with the pad of her thumb he thought that this couldn't get better, that nothing he would ever do would be quite as excellent as the feel of Lisbon, his Lisbon enveloping him so.

Then she started to move.

She rocked up and down on his pelvis, adding a twist, pivot or squeeze at key moments to draw out the pleasure even further. Any thoughts of kissing were long forgotten, as were any concerns about performance, for as far as Lisbon and Jane were concerned each second of frenzied movement extended into millennia, and even if it were over in two seconds then they would be the best two seconds of either of their lives.

After an uncertain amount of time, which was definitely longer than two seconds, Jane began to feel his peak approaching, and fear clenched at him suddenly. Even though Lisbon was clearly enjoying herself, if her moans and grunts were any indication, he knew that she hadn't yet had time to get _there, _and that he would definitely be finished before she was.

A hand snaked its way from its hold on her torso to where they were joined, and in three or four motions of his talented hands he felt her begin to shake around him, which was good because at that exact moment he felt his release crest. They screamed out into the night together, joint wails of pleasure and love, with each other's names thrown in a few times for good measure.

Sated and boneless Lisbon fell against Jane's chest, and they soon both fell into a calm, dreamless sleep like none either had had in years, comforted by the knowledge that they were wrapped in their lover's arms.

**So? Love it? Hate it? Hate me for unleashing this into the internet? Leave me a review and tell me about it, whether you want more smut in this story or want me to never write smut again, I won't know if you don't tell me. Also I'm always looking for prompts, so if you have one of those let me know too, any rating or idea, or paring for that matter.**


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